It Must Be NFL Season

I’m really surprised it took this long. It didn’t seem like an NFL offseason recently as there has been no controversy or criminal activity to keep the attention on football. However, today it was announced that Le’Veon Bell is facing a four game suspension and Ezekiel Elliot allegedly assaulted his ex-girlfriend. This is all just a reminder that camp is right around the corner.

Bell is facing a suspension for a missed drug test. Why is that worse than a failed drug test? Because he can’t even claim he was taking some protein that must have had some banned substance in it or he got a second-hand high from his friends who were smoking weed. Unless he had some personal shit going on, he basically has to confess that he simply overslept. It’s okay Le’Veon, we’ve all been there…in college.

Elliot’s charges are just a tad less amusing. He’s immediately denied the claims by his ex-girlfriend that he assaulted and gave her multiple bruises on her arm. This sort of looks like a false alarm, but I’m hoping the rest of the world doesn’t just assume that this girl is making stuff up.

Oh, and Dennis Green died. If you’re a Bears fan you’re truly saddened by this. Green is a constant reminder of the one good Bears team that we’ve had since 1985, and provided one of the most memorable rants in NFL history when his Cardinals choked away a victory.

It’s almost like the NFL was sitting on all of these stories and just decided to release everything today to make sure everyone knows that football is coming once again. “No press is bad press” should be the slogan of the NFL. It should be in gold lettering right below the shield that Roger Goodell is sworn to protect. It’s been a quiet offseason…I guess we should’ve seen this stuff coming.

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