The Most Exciting Player in the World Series Can’t Start Tonight Because of a Stupid Rule

Kyle Schwarber just made a ridiculous comeback from a horrific injury. He’s unquestionably the biggest story in this World Series as he continues to rake at the plate. He can’t play the field yet because there is simply too much risk in it. The sudden movements required to play the outfield are too much for knee ligaments that are still healing. And because the MLB is dumb, he can’t play tonight.

It’s absolutely insane that the National League still doesn’t have the DH position. Because of this asinine resistance to let the best hitters hit, Schwarber will be sitting in the dugout to start the game. Then after he pinch hits he’ll be replaced in the field. Sweet. But on the plus side we’ll get to see Kyle Hendricks hit, because that’s really going to drive the interest in baseball.

Don’t give me any crap about Arrieta or Bumgardner hitting home runs. Why? Because out of the roughly 360 pitchers that are on MLB teams, those are the only two you can recall being not horrible at hitting. It’s also completely ridiculous that there are different rules for each league. While we’re at it, let’s make a rule saying no turnoversĀ can be moved forward by the defense in the NFC. If you intercept a pass with no one around you, you have to just fall to the ground. But only in the NFC. Makes sense.

I just want to thank the MLB for robbing us of at least six Schwarber at bats while the games are played at Wrigley. No worries though, we’ll get to hear Joe Buck try and think of something clever to say when the camera pans over to Schwarber sitting on the bench every inning. And speaking of games at Wrigley, another solid decision to stick with the All Star Game determining home field advantage in the World Series. Who wants to see more than three games at Wrigley anyways?

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